Let's Talk Benjamin Franklin

 Today I'm going to dive straight into the prickly issue of money.
Let's talk Benjamin Franklin (or we can talk smack about it if you'd like)
To be straight up honest, money is NOT my favorite conversation to have.
I think I feel like I'll break out in hives every time we have to have our weekly budget conversation.  The husband and I.

I feel like I grew up with a considerably healthy view of the dollar.
My parents were ahead of their game, so to speak.  They implemented things way back then, that are just becoming 'money smart' now.  
And I know I have them to thank for the financial rewards I'm reaping today.
I never felt like it was a terrible thing to have money, or be wealthy.
But I know that a tremendous amount of people have a mental block about wealth.
Like God doesn't want you rich.  That money is a pitfall that opens Pandora's box to all kinds of sin and temptation.

Myron and I are over the halfway point in the Financial Peace University course we have been leading this winter.
You guys, if you haven't done it, take this class!  
It will totally rock your financial world, and begin to set your finances right side up!
We've had some cool testimonies come out of this class already, and we're not finished!
If you live local, stay tuned.  We're going to be putting another class together later this summer or fall.  You don't want to miss it!
And just a plug about an FPU class:  while you can do this course on your own, at home, it is so much more worthwhile to do with a class.  You get accountability (a huge factor in making it work), you learn off of each other's successes/mistakes, and you get to hear each other's cool stories and be motivated.  So please, do the class with a group!

 Myron and I have budgeted for quite a while, but got super serious about it again a while ago and instead of budgeting purely to know where our dollars went, we're serious about TELLING that dollar where it goes and making it work for us, not the other way around.

While Financial Peace University says that it will bring peace to your finances,
Oh. My. Gracious.  This is my 2 cents: it will bring turmoil before peace.  Insert scowly emoticon.
We have had more heated discussions over money this winter, than we've had heated discussions period, for years.  I'm not a big spender to begin with, and to try to squeeze my dollar so hard I 'give George Washington a headache' has given ME headaches also.  I'm in it for the long-term result, so the short-term discomfort is just going to have to work it's self out.
Myron is definitely the 'nerd' about money, and I'm more of a 'free spirit'.  He is a fanatic about crunching and entering numbers (which is totally what is going to make this whole budget work for us),  I just don't spend more money than I have to so when I'm asked to 'ingest pennies and poop dimes',  I tend to get a little cranky.  

But ya'll, I'm LEARNING!  YAY!  (We're getting somewhere!!!)
I've been obsessed with getting my hands on any good books I can find out there that back up what is taught in FPU.  Just kind of drenching myself in money talk.  I love reading books that reinforce and grow what I already have stashed in my brain database.  These are some of the books I read, just in the last week:

While I didn't enjoy all of these, here are some books I'd totally recommend:
The Millionaire Next Door 
Complete Guide to Money (of course!)
Smart Money Smart Kids (We are implementing this with our kids, 20 years from now, ask me how it turned out)
Rich Dad Poor Dad 
5 Lessons A Millionaire Taught Me 
I know there are so many more books to be read, and more that I have read, but these are just a few of my current favorites that I've read recently.

I'm not a teacher, so I won't proceed to explain and direct you into all things budget-ey,
But I will point you toward some terrific online tools to use for creating and maintaining a budget.

Here's a few to get you started
-Quicken     
 This has been around for a while and if you're a computer genius you can make your own spreadsheets and work the system like you want.  We're not like that.
-Mvelopes    
 We used to use this.  It's great for tracking WHERE your money is going.  It didn't really work for a zero-based budget (Which BTW, is the only way to budget) (essentially TELLING your money where to go, not just tracking it).  This also can be linked to your bank account, so in essence, it recognizes your purchases and puts them in certain categories.  You still have to do some legwork to divide them then, say for instance, you went to Wal-Mart and bought food as well as clothing.  It would recognize Wal-Mart, and probably place it under the grocery catalog, but then you would need to change it and divide it properly into categories.
-EveryDollar
If you've taken FPU in the past, this seems to be the version replacing the Gazelle Budget tool.  We tried the Gazelle budget and it just didn't work for us. Also, it was a little pricey to pay for it's use. (Which, if your budget tells you it ain't there, it ain't there.  Free is always good) The EveryDollar budget system seems to have real promise.  It's got an app, and it's free (at least for now).  
-YNAB
This is what Myron and I use.  We've loved it so far.   It allows you to move money between categories, it's connected to Drop Box but downloaded on your computer, it's got a slick app that you can enter purchases into at the time of purchase, and you can also pin a location so that when you are at, say Aldi, it will recognize that and all you need to do is enter the amount.

A comment on using an effective budget, and especially YNAB, you will learn to spend the money you earned the previous month.  So, in April, you will be spending March's income.  That money should all be divided into categories, every dollar going somewhere, until your budget equals $0.00.  This is a zero-based budget.  And you're only spending the money that you actually have.  Yay!  No more adding on debt.  It's a little tough the first few months to get started, since you may not have that whole paycheck in your bank account anymore.  We transferred that amount over from our savings, so that we could start out fresh, but if you don't have that money available, you'll be pinching your pennies super tight to save that base amount to start your budget.  And BTW, everyone declares that when you're tight financially, you eat a lot of mac and cheese and tuna.  My calculations tell me that tuna is not,  I repeat, NOT a budget friendly food.  That's just fishy advertising.  

There are so many areas to jump off of, into this area of money.   I've got a whole list of awesome books to read, on the 'spiritual' side of money.  Since I believe in the supernatural and definitely want to see God as my ultimate Provider, I don't want to base all of this money talk on purely the logical side of money.  The actual pennies and dollars on paper.  Sometimes we need to see how God provides ABUNDANTLY, not just logically through our paychecks.  I've heard some pretty awesome sermons on spiritual provision and God's blessing on economics, and have got some great books to recommend also.  That will have to be an entirely different post.  

But I have begun learning one thing about 'spiritual money'.  It's that God blesses and multiplies the assets of a person who is a faithful steward of what He gives.  People double their incomes, folks, just by following Godly financial principles.  He also smiles strongly on the cheerful Giver, and I believe you won't lack for anything if you give graciously.  It's like the law of gravity, what goes up, comes down.  Except, with money, when you give, it's given to you.  Even some of the 'worldy' books I've read on money, recognize that it is a universal law of life.  And I'm not being greedy by saying I want more, so that I can give more.   So we will budget, and budget hard, and we will 'Live like no-one else, so that someday we can Give like no-one else'.  And if this means I don't get out of the house much, rarely eat out, buy second-hand clothes, and have holes in my socks, then by golly, I'm giving it my best shot.  I'm putting it out there: I will squeeze and wheeze my way into that budget every month.  One last personal note: when it came to cutting our grocery budget back, I put my foot down on cutting back on hospitality.  Hospitality can be costly, it can cost you water, electric, food, other resources.  But to me, this is part of my giving to God.  And hospitality was not getting kicked to the curb EVER.  So I encourage you, to take what you have, and use it wisely to bless and be blessed.

What are some of the best money tips/advice you've received, that have benefited you tremendously?  What methods have gotten you the most bang for your buck? 
                                           JO 

Profiteroles

Mmm.  If I had to pick a favorite pastry, creme puffs would be in the top running.
There is something about their light, fluffy poof and cream
That creates a sort of denial of the calories they contain.
It's like the pillowy puff will allow you so much less guilt, than any richer dessert.

I've been a fan of creme puffs for years, and have literally tried my hand at them 
Ever since I was like 13 or 14.  A long time, folks.
But this past Christmas, I made some that just reminded me all over again, Why I love them so much.

I did these for a banquet, and easily doubled and even tripled the recipe with great results.  If this is your first go
at creme puffs, then I'd suggest you start with just the basic amounts before you get too crazy about going for doubles or more.  It will blow your mind how very simple they are to mix and bake.


Here is the recipe:

Ingredients

• Puff Shells
• 1 C water
• ½ C butter (1 stick)
• 1 C all-purpose flour
• 4 large eggs
• Custard  
• 1/2 C. sugar
• ⅓ cup all-purpose flour
• 1/4 tsp. salt
• 2 C warm milk
• 4 egg yolks, beaten
• 1 tsp vanilla
• Sweet Cream:
• 1 pint heavy whipping cream
• Granulated sugar to taste
• Vanilla to taste

Instructions

1. For the shells:
2.  Preheat oven to 400F degrees. Set aside a large (12 or more) muffin tin, very lightly buttered.
3. In a medium sauce pan, bring water and butter to a low boil over medium-high heat. Reduce heat to medium-low and add flour, stirring well until mixture forms a ball. Remove from heat. Stir in eggs, one at a time, beating with spoon or large fork until dough is smooth. Beat additional 10 seconds to continue to increase volume of the dough.
4. Using a tablespoon, drop dough into deep muffin tins. Divide all the batter between 12 tins. You can also divide the dough by TBfuls onto a cookie sheet, for less puffy, more spread out, shells.
5. Bake shells in 400 degrees oven for 25 to 35 minutes or until puffed and golden brown. Important that the puffs are golden/crisp or they may collapse. Remove from oven and cool completely.
6. (The shells can be prepared the day before. Just lightly cover when completely cooled and let sit at room temperature.)
7. For the custard cream filling:
8. Place the 4 egg yolks in a medium bowl. Whisk them together and set aside.
9. Mix sugar, flour and salt in a medium saucepan. Stir in warm milk. Cook over medium heat, stirring almost constantly. Mixture will thicken and bubble. Once it starts to bubble, cook one minute more while still stirring.
10. Remove from heat. Stir about half of the mixture into beaten egg yolks.
11. Blend this back into remaining hot mixture in the saucepan. Stir constantly just until mixture begins to bubble again.
12. Add vanilla and stir until combined. Remove from heat. Set aside.
13. For the sweetened cream:
14. Whip heavy cream until soft peaks form, and add sugar and vanilla to your liking.
15. Assembling the cream puffs:
16. Cut off shell tops and scoop out the insides of top and bottom to make room for the custard and whipped cream.  Often the puff is so full of air inside, there will be a natural indentation and you won't need to do this step.
17. Dip the bottom of the puff into powdered sugar, then repeat with top of puff. This will coat the puffs  and gives a "French pastry"  look.
18. Fill bottom of puff with Custard Filling. Top generously with the whipped cream.
19. Replace top of puff. Place puffs in refrigerator, uncovered, chilling for 4 hours (at least one hour). Do not cover the puffs in fridge or the powdered sugar will disintegrate into the puff. 

Makes about 12 cream puffs if made in muffin tin.

These cream puffs make an excellent carrier for chicken salad, tuna, eclaire fillings, fresh fruit and cream, and the list is almost endless.

*On a side note: I have no idea why the French word for cream puff is sometimes Profiterole.  All I can think of when I read that is: Profit and roll.  Elementary, I know.  I'm just thinking that if I had a restaurant, I'd be making creme puffs to make a profit-roll too.  (I'm not even sure that I should be laughing at myself right now either-major eye roll)

laissez les bons temps rouler!

JO 

(Black is still) The New Black

Black is such a lovely color to me.
If you've ever been in our home, you probably noticed that.
Black and white may just be my favorite colors, 
If they're even allowed to be in the color family.

I notice that black and white pop up when I take pictures,
like the one above.

Our master bedroom is black and white and I find it so soothing.  The only thing I'd really change, is to add in white linen curtains.  I adore linen also.  The curtains we have are actually from the fabric markets in Thailand, they are a sheer black with white ribbon roses stitched onto the sheer.

)

The handwriting on the wall (quite literally) was such a fun project.  I just went at my white wall with a yardstick and a sharpie.  I love it so much.

I've got black on my walls in our living space
and black on cabinets, countertops, and in decorations.

 I have such great admiration for those fun spaces you see in peoples homes.
All full of bright colors, in turquoise, yellows, and so much more.  I'm such a fan of happy spaces. 
But I'm ok with those colors just not being my thing.  
Black and white are calming to me, and I love the freshness
of a space, minus the chaos of color.  
Airy, but dramatic I guess.
All I can say though is, gracious, I hope colors don't identify
your personality that drastically.
Because if that is the case, I'm either dull and boring
or incredibly moody and dramatic, as well as airy.
Let's just not go there.
Even the outside of our house is white.
And if I didn't need to go through the Historic District Board
to do it, my front door would probably be painted,
you guessed it, Black.

 

 My pinterest board looks like someone took an eraser to it
and completely scrubbed out all the colors, 
except for black and white.

One of my favorite online magazines, delivered to my inbox
has so much monochromatic going on, I can hardly stand it.
Est Magazine 

I also love to follow this blog
Her pinterest board is amazing.

I'm in love.
And I think that Black is Still the New Black.

What about you?  Are you a bright happy color person?

JO 

(Chocolate) In A Box

 On Saturday, the Great Day of Hearts (properly celebrated by some, over-celebrated by others, and completely dreaded by the rest of the population), we completely sealed our 'valentines is about others' deal.  I wrote a minor report on what I've taught my kids to think of Valentines, and although I do mildly regret -at times- teaching them it's not just for lovers, I am now withholden to practice what I've been practicing and preaching up until this point.  So they come into Valentines, fully expecting that their father will lather on the goodies for them, and that we'll be treating someone else to some fun Valentines-related treats as well.  The thought never crosses their minds that Myron and I would go out together -sans kids- on Valentines.

This year did not disappoint.  We rose early, made some heart shaped bacon and eggs, and went full on into the day.  We had some fun desserts to prepare, flowers to arrange, new stranger-guests to be had for a delightful afternoon/eve and pizza, as well as some babysitting thrown in there.   Myron and I have some single, guy-friends who had it on their heart to serve some of their lady-friends, a 5 star dinner for the evening, and we got nominated to do dessert.  They put together a fabulous (from what I've heard) dinner, and we provided the dessert and the flowers.  It was so fun to make these chocolate boxes, filled with a light chocolate mousse, brownie bites, and raspberries.  Drizzled in white chocolate. 

While I know Valentines Day is over, at least for this year, I love the idea of these chocolate boxes so much.  They're just a perfect way to serve up something 'a little fancy' and make anyone feel special.  They would make a terrific Easter brunch extra: Made of white chocolate and filled with fruit.  Or bridal shower food.  Or just to show your handsome husband how much you love him. 

Here's the process:

1 chocolate bar of your choice

Extra chocolate for melting.

Cut the chocolate into 4 pieces.  Or you can get fancy and go for 5, using the 5th piece as a 'lid'.

Melt the additional chocolate and dip the 4 pieces into it, on the short ends.  'Glue' the four pieces together by holding them upright until the chocolate has cooled enough to stand on their own. 

Here's my mousse recipe:

Simple and easy version-

3 C. cold milk

1/2C. instant pudding mix 

1 16 oz. carton of heavy whipping cream

Chocolate syrup (if desired)

Place all ingredients into a mixing bowl and beat on high until peaks form.  You can add in as much, or as little, chocolate syrup as you like.

The complex (and very worth it) version involves making your own custard, instead of the instant pudding, melting in the real chocolate and then cooling.  After which you would whip in your heavy cream until peaks form.  I love this version with white chocolate, instead of milk or dark.  

I think mousse almost always screams "Add fruit to me!  I'm not complete or perfect without it!".  Mousse is like the dessert of my dreams...light, fluffy, only mildly sweet, and yet so smooth and easy on the taste buds.

laissez les bons temps rouler!

Jo

Fade

 Isaiah 40:6,7-"Everyone is as frail as grass, and their loveliness fades like flowers in the field....when the breathe of the Lord blows over it".

(loosely translated)

Last week we attended my grandmothers funeral.  She was an old soul, and we all desired greatly for her to be in the presence of Jesus for some time.  She lived life full and well and had turned 90 at the beginning of winter.  Death, after a life-cup brim to overflowing, feels so different than one that is abrupt, young and only partially lived.

In a sense, I feel like 'history' died with my grandma.  Like suddenly I realize just how close I am to growing old and being 'that generation'.  I also have this overwhelming sense that, along with her, died memories and stories of my dad.  Even in her last years of partial dementia, she would always say something about him when we would visit her in her elderly-care room.  She would fuss over how much my husband looked like him.  Remind me of how my dad would've loved his grandkids if he could've been here.  It's like a part of him lived with her, and I feel this great loss of him all over again, now that she isn't here to remind me.

We know we aren't made to be here forever.  And I feel great joy over the release of her old body into a new one, one she lived her life to be rewarded with.  She was fiery, motivated, and didn't mince words.  She spoke her mind but she prayed hard.  And in the last years, she struggled graciously as her body and mind gave out on her but there was a level of trust and sweetness that came out during these years that I had never seen before.

My grandparents were married for 71 years.  And my grandfather faithfully went to see her in the nursing home, almost every day, for the last 3 1/2 years.  My grandfather is 'fit as a fiddle' at 92 years old and he so tenderly cared for her.  It was like their relationship mellowed and sweetened during these years.  The loss of his Love was heartbreaking to watch.  He bent low over her casket and gave her the tenderest of kisses as he said goodbye with tears streaming down his face.  And I got this big old knot well up in my throat and my tears then were not for me, but for him.  Seeing the missing and the longing and all the memories of loving, desiring and cherishing come to a close as the lid of the casket thumped shut.

Myron asked me on the way home, what I think would be the most difficult: losing a Love like that at a young age or when you are so close to the end of life.  Here is the thing: when you are young, the tragedy of it can be overwhelming, I believe.  There's a life to be lived without that One person and it can take your heart and leave you broken.  Losing someone at the end of your life is losing, well, your life.  There aren't time for new memories. You awoke every morning to care for that one person and what is there to awaken for tomorrow?  

I don't know.  I only know, that at whatever age, loving someone will always create an opportunity to feel the pain of loss.  Like Isaiah said, "We all wither and fade like a flower", and death is expected at some point.  Carpe Diem.

JO

Truffles

 Back in December, I had posted a picture on Instagram of the truffles I was making for one of my Christmas banquets.  A few people wanted the recipe, and let me tell you, these do not disappoint.  They are so creamy and delicious.

The recipe is not original with me, a friend brought us a beautiful box full one December day a very long time ago and I begged for the recipe. Here it is:

1 1/2 lbs. chocolate wafers or chips

8 oz. Cream cheese, softened

1lb. chocolate for coating

Melt the 24oz. (1 1/2lbs) of chocolate in the microwave.  Or my favorite way to melt it slow is to set a glass bowl over the top of a pan of boiling water.  Bring the water temp back a little, dump the chocolate into the bowl and it melts slow and smooth.  Add the softened cream cheese and flavoring (more on that in a minute).  Big tip: go scant on the chocolate.  The cream cheese makes them creamy and silky, chocolate tends to dry them out. Mix well. Refrigerate a bit.  Drop by teaspoonfulls onto wax paper; chill again until firm enough to roll in your hand.  Roll into balls; place on wax paper and again chill until firm.  Melt the chocolate for coating, then dip the balls into it.  This is the stage when you'd want to sprinkle with any fun candies,sprinkles, etc. I also really love to add in a dash of coconut oil to my dipping chocolate, since it makes the melted chocolate so smooth and also hardens quickly when cooled.  When hardened, drizzle with white chocolate, dark chocolate or candy coating.  

Here are some variations:

(Just make adjustments to the basic recipe above)

Mocha:

16oz. milk chocolate, 8 oz. dark

3 TB. strong coffee

Coat with 12oz. milk chocolate and 4 oz. dark

Mint:

24oz. milk chocolate

10 drops creme de menthe flavor

Coat with 16oz. dark chocolate 

You can tinker with adding in other flavorings to the truffle or to the coating.(Think caramel, raspberry, key lime, etc)  Flavorings that contain alcohol will tend to dry out your chocolate faster as well, so just ease up a bit on how many drops or teaspoonfuls you use.  LorAnn Gourmet flavors packs a lot of flavor in just a few drops.

This recipe yields 50-60 candies 

Have fun and experiment.  This would be a fun Valentines project to do with the kids, or an irresistable treat for a special somebody.  They are beautiful tucked into a box with some tissue paper and wrapped in a bow.

I'd love to know if you try them!

JO

Well, hey there.  WWwwwww...that was me, blowing off the dust that has collected on this blog.  If you've stuck around at all, checked in on me anytime, you'll know that neglect has set in dreadfully.  
For so many reasons:
+ the homeschool factor
+ the ain't got my own computer factor (which really, belongs fair and square in the homeschool sector)
+ the laundry/house/babies factor
+ the old 'everyone else is so much better at this than me' factor
+ the whole 'blogs are so yesterday' theory
And so on.... 

Really, I dearly love to write but it feels so personal to me.  I love to try things...many many things and attempt to be good at them.  When I find something that I really love, I become very protective of them.  I don't mind at all making mistakes on so many things, but when it comes to something that speaks to me, and makes me feel like 'me', I become a bit afraid of not being good enough for myself.  And others.  And all that.  

I've said it before, but I'll throw it out there again.  We'll dust this blog off, see where it takes us.  

It will be random, I'm sure, the path from here.  But I do have some yummy recipes I'm looking forward to sharing with you, some local blogger friends I want to introduce you to and I'm itching to get some guest bloggers over here as well as getting back to just sharing about life.  

I've been having a lot of fun over on Instagram during the last couple of months and you'll find me here: houseonmain.  

See you soon?

JO

Entertaining Angels

I'm ba-a-ack. My goodness how two months fly.
They seemed to stretch so long, and yet, they're over like snap.
We got back a few days ago from a couple weeks in the south.
Myron had work at the SC branch for two weeks
And the kiddies and I got to do school, enjoy the (little) bit of warm weather, and hang out with good friends. To be honest, we were so spoiled by time with friends since we stayed so close to some really good ones and it was a daily occurrence to run up the little pathway to their yard and their house and be welcomed in so freely.  The second week we switched over to staying in a little one bedroom apartment, but we still spent time at their house, as well as lots of fun time with another family and Kent and MaryAnna (who came all the way from TN for 3 days).  I am grateful, so grateful, for how these women loved on my kids and how their older kids were so patient and willing to tote my young ones around with them.  This is a gift that is beyond value to me.

I've been wanting to share a post with you for a while.
One on entertaining guests (more specifically overnight guests) in our homes.
I came back from this trip motivated to write this all out.
I can't claim expert status on this, or even semi-pro.
I learn from every guest that stays with us, and I hope to someday, be ultra good at it!

"Don't forget to have strangers in your homes, because some people have done this and it happened to be an angel and they had no idea who had stayed with them!"  (Hebrews 13:2, paraphrased liberally)

Growing up, I remember my parents often having overnight guests.  We had moved to a new state, new community, and their family and old friends would often come for a weekend visit to scope out the new digs.  I also remember doing a lot of traveling to see family and friends.  Quite honestly, I don't remember of ever staying in a strangers home, tho maybe we have and my memory just fails on this level.  In a Mennonite community it is so easy to connect to someone you remotely know, through someone else, etc.  So there never seem to be total strangers.  And often your friends end up being people mostly within the Mennonite community.

The neighborhood I was raised in had lots of kids running amok in the street.  So unlike many Mennonite kids, I feel like I got to know "outside" people.  The neighborhood kids regularly fished in our pond, played on our swing set and hunted for crayfish in our creek.  We may or may not have learned some, ahem, language and weird behavior from them as well.  My mom had a big old bell she'd ring when she needed us to come back home from running around at the neighbors'. 

A few years ago, when we started going to another church, outside the Mennonite community, I didn't feel as "out to sea" as I had expected.  Although I had grown up running with the neighbor kids,  I think I expected to have a harder time relating to people, when what I really found out was that there are just A LOT of good... no, GREAT... people out there.  Our church networks with a lot of churches, both in the states and worldwide, and we often host conferences where people come from all over to attend.

Have I lost you?  I feel like I might have regressed a bit from my post content, and yet the background to all this is the foundation of where I'm going with "entertaining angels".

We have had the privilege, and it really has been a privilege and not work like I imagined it to be, to host many, many overnight guests.  Most, if not all, have at some point been complete strangers to us before they entered our home.  It would take more than two hands to count the number of times, in the last 5 years, that we have had strangers stay with us.  And most times, not just 1 night, but an extended weekend or week at a time.  I can't believe sometimes, that God arranged this life for me, the girl who used to get physically ill at the thought of having my turn for "host family" (a Mennonite tradition of taking turns to have visitors/other church family over for Sunday lunch) come around again.  I would cry, I H-A-T-E-D it so much (if you need proof, ask my husband).

Many of these strangers we have hosted over the last few years, have turned into wonderful friends.  And if you're reading this, you know who you are!  And I am so thankful for you, and how God landed you in our imperfect home.

So here are some of the things I've learned:
1. It's not about you, it's NOT about your house, it's about your guest.
There was that two year period of not having a kitchen that taught me that you don't need to have a place in perfect, liveable condition to entertain overnight guests.  Because they really don't mind that your washer and dryer are your countertop, that your "kitchen"is just a gutted,barren room and they'll gladly wash dishes in your laundry sink.  Making sure that your guests feel at home and you are giving freely of your truest self, is the biggest key to a successful visit.  I was so freaking embarrassed at first, at how these stranger guests got to know our family's bad habits and attitudes so quickly, because my family is just so real it's ridiculous.  I'm finally learning to just accept that it is just who we are and it's ok to not be perfect.
2. Fake it till you make it.
I just told you to be your truest self, and now I tell you to fake it!?  Do be yourself, but when it comes to your guests quarters, do what ya gotta do to make it look and feel comfy.  My husband expects the multiple pillows on our bed to disappear when we are expecting guests.  Why?  I didn't have the resources to buy a ton of pillows for a while, so I made do with what we had.  I wanted the guest bed to have plenty of pillows and so to do without one for a few nights was just ok.  Slowly I'm collecting more accessories, etc to make the guest room guest-ready even at a moments notice.  Even the down comforter and bed cover have disappeared to the guest room regularly.  So find throws, pillows, whatever it is that you need, from around your house and make it comfy.  If you don't have a guest room, give up the master bedroom and bunk in with your kids.  I know many guests feel badly if they know you gave up your bed for them, but on the other hand, nothing says you're special and worth treating well, than to self sacrifice for your guest.
3. Learn from your guests

Is there something they've asked for?  More than likely it will be something that the next will appreciate also, even if it's not a necessity for them.  Make a note of it, and have it at the ready for the next time.

4. A list of some essentials that make your guest room comfortable:
     a. If possible, go for a Queen size bed.  Please don't pile the guilt on yourself if you've only got a double or a single...it's ok.  But sleeping with a 6'plus man, I've learned that sleeping in anything smaller just gets uncomfortable and makes for sleepless nights.  So if you've got the room and resources, make it a Q!
     b. Layers.  Clean sheets and pillow covers, of course.  And then blankets and a bed cover.  I like to keep another layer folded on the end of the bed, for looks and for comfort.  Throw pillows just add that touch of pretty.  And throw blankets make curling up to read a book, cozy.
     c. Lamps and lights.  Still working on this one.  This house doesn't possess ceiling lights in the upstairs so whatever light there is, is what we've added.  I have a tulle "canopy" over the guest bed along with a string of lights.  A lamp beside the bed is a good idea, so it's easy to switch off after you're tucked into bed.
     d. A mirror.  Noone wants to wait till they've found the bathroom to see that their trip down the hall had the potential for great embarrassment. 
     e.  A chair or bench to sit on.  Often if your guests are people you don't know well, they will probably spend a larger amount of time in their room than if they are your best buds.  Give them a place to sit and chill, besides just the bed.
     f.  A place to put their suitcase.  Like a bench, or a closet, or a luggage rack.
     g.  All the little things:
            -Snacks (this is a big one for entertaining strangers, often guests would like a nibble but would never ask. Crackers, granola bars, dried fruit, and water are some good munchies to keep on the dresser)
            -Alarm clock
            -USB adaptor for laptops.  Adaptor from a 2 prong electric outlet to a 3 (our house is so old most outlets are wired for a 2 prong.  And this is extremely inconvenient for any electronic devices)
            -Internet password
            -Two clean towels/washclothes for every guest
            -Soap, shampoo, toothpaste, lotion, etc in case they forgot something from home.
            -Tissues
            -I've added a microwave and refrigerator to our guest room closet, although i haven't seen them get used yet, it still allows "stranger" guests to store/heat things without feeling they are bothering you in the kitchen.  This is a total splurge and very much not a must.
            -Fresh flowers and books/magazines are not a must, but sure add a touch of pleasant to the guest room.

5.  Help your guests bring in the luggage and show them where the necessities are, namely the restroom and the kitchen.  And leave a nightlight on in the bathroom, or hallway, because a stubbed toe or loud clatter in the middle of the night in a strange home is just not cool.  In addition, make sure they've got a clean bathroom to use.  There is nothing more disgusting than the sprinkle from your kids' last tinkle putting off an odor to a complete stranger.  Just sayin'.
6.  Communicate with your guests.  This is one that I'm personally working on.  I want to communicate more efficiently on what they can expect when they're in my home.  Let them know what time breakfast will be if they're eating with you.  That your kids are early birds, but they are welcome to sleep as long as they want.  Where the spare key is, if they are in and out of your house.  What your schedule will look like. Etc,etc.  You get the idea.
7.  Be available.  To help, to watch their children so they can get time away, to run to town for a need they have, etc.  If you're not home, leave a phone number they can get a hold of you with.
8.  Most importantly, make a new friend.  I  get the chills when I think about how some of these "strangers" have become such good friends that when they stay with us now, they feel comfortable to get up before we're even awake and put the coffee on.  Or raid my fridge and pantry for a nighttime snack if they come in late and we're already tucked in.  It's just so amazing to me and I love it!

Above all, I repeat, just give of who you are...your personality, family, and space...to your guests.  More likely than not, they will  feel more free to be who they really are.  When you allow an environment like that to be the standard for hosting your "stranger" guests, they often will trust you with themselves and you'll find yourself listening to, and giving encouragement and prayer over, their stresses/fears/and difficult circumstances in their lives.  I still am drawn to praying for some of the hurts, fears, victories that have been shared through our "stranger" guests who are no longer strangers, but now friends. 

So I invite you, and strongly encourage you, to invite strangers in to your home.  Your life will become a wealth of friends and you'll be overwhelmed at the grace that God will allow to flow through you.

I saw this on a friends' wall and it is my heart for our guests:
"Dear Lord, swing the doors of our home open wide
So all people will feel welcome and loved.

May the floors and the walls be strong enough
To carry the burdens of those who come.

We pray noone leaves feeling less
Than when he entered... "

JO

*Do you have some guest tips?  I'd love to hear them, and learn from you!
 

{Chatter}

Polar Vortex.  It's a noun and a verb.
It's the freeze de creme.  Top of the class, passing with flying colors to drive us housebound saints
To end sainthood and wear horns.
Saying we're ready for spring is completely redundant.  Like a drip drip drip from a leaky spouting.
On that note: we grew some monumental icicles this year.
Whereby we realize that this old house probably could use some work on its balding head.

 This winter has called for layers, warm blankets, and cozy corners.  We've longed for a wood stove more times than I can count.  But haven't we all!
One fun thing that happened this month was the arrival of my chairs.  You know you don't get out much when you're super excited to find them on your porch steps and your kids are as equally, or more, excited about the big boxes they came in.

I am an off-the-curb, freeby, second hand shop kind of girl.  The only furniture we've ever bought new were our couch and love seat (now that I think about it, we did get a kitchen table also).  Our bedroom set was a gift and brand new when we got married as well but I don't shop furniture stores to buy.  Just for funsies, ideas, and to wipe drool from my chin.  I had stuck some $ away from some projects I worked on to buy chairs for the living room, and World War III almost commenced while Myron and I quarreled politely discussed the uses for that particular $.  I spent literally MONTHs searching out the perfect recycled leather chairs for the perfect price.  I'm not picky, I'm just particular about what furniture I want brought into the house at this point.  I finally found these two for an excellent excellent deal the company was running.  After I ordered the chairs, I received a personally written email saying these chairs were out of stock.  Who does that anymore, personal e-mails?  Any who-ha, they promised to ship me some in a month or two.  Hmm.  Well, my husbands doubts were put to rest. when the UPS man unloaded the loot.  The company just launched their first catalog,  so give them a few years and I think you'll hear more about Safavieh home.  I think they've got a gorgeous line of home goods, and they're willing to customize (which is absolutely hard to come by).  We love the chairs we got, the kids curl up in them with a book, all the time.  And they're beautiful as well!

It was time to get the Christmas decorations packed up and off the mantels.  I was feeling particularly lazy about it this year.  I'm thinking about bringing in some twig clippings again, and forcing some real blooms soon.  I've also got a severe itch to start my own garden seedlings/flower seeds again, but after failing so miserably a few times before, I think that's an itch I shouldn't scratch.  I dream of glorious gardens and then every spring I relearn that I've not got a very green thumb.  I can even kill a geranium and they're tough suckers normally.  I'm loving perennials more and more.  Just plant 'em and let them do their thang.

The end of winter does bring about a slight problem:  the death of hot drinks.  If you happen to see the mister and I toting beer bellies, well, it's not beer that's to blame (what makes anyone desire that nasty stuff anyway, is just more than I can understand) but the smooth, alluring, tempting, silky smoothness of latte's, cappucino's, and London fog's, and all their accompanying sweetness.  I thought I was a diehard Trim Healthy Mama, until I ran out of my sweentener of choice (the old NuNaturals) and now I'm back to syrups with cane sugar.  Gah!  I totally live for my daily Smog--Myron's preferred term of endearment for a London Fog.  Thank you, Oak Leaf Cafe, for ruining my coffee habit and cordially introducing us.

 Valentine's Day was thrown in there somewhere.  I'm not cupid so we don't go crazy over Valentine's.  My kids don't know it's for lovers, and I like it that way.  I've tried to make it a habit to love on other people that day, and get my kids involved, because when they're 30 and possibly still single I don't  want them spending the week prior to said holiday whining about their single status.  The younger they learn to love whomever may be in their life during that holiday, the more content they'll be when they're older.  But the day couldn't go by without the usual chocolate strawberries or taking pictures of them.  There was not room on the internet, facebook or instagram for one more picture of a strawberry smothered in chocolate, on the week of Valentine's, but we went renegade and took them anyway.  Long live this traditional delicacy!

Now we're headed rapidly towards the weekend and more good-bye's.  My dearest mother left last weekend for the far-off continent of Asia again and the allure of warm weather in Thailand after being stateside for 6 weeks.  Good times.  This weekend we say adieu to another one of our own as my best big smaller brother and beautiful wife and kids head for greener pastures in TN.  I miss them already.

JO

{I homeschool, therefore I am}

*Disclaimer:  If you are easily offended, this may not be the post for you.
I am going to be extremely sarcastic, and will make mountains out of ant hills.
Please, for the sake of peace, return to your normal scheduled activities.
Or laugh along with me, poke a little fun, and take a think or two about the boxes
We put each other in.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

So a few weeks back I posted a link on my facebook wall.
Cause it was funny and I was having one of those days where my kids were on the verge
Of being marched over to either school next door (take your pick, there are two)
And handed off to some less-than-willing teacher.
I read this and my thinker went "ching".

This is the normal "box" that most people (non-homeschoolers for clarification) tend to put
Those of us "crazies" into.  (Some) Homeschoolers will totally understand my point of view.
(Some) Homeschool moms will be mad as hornets and think I have totally blown my good character.
(Some)Non-Homeschooled will laugh, feel pity, and smugly wrap up their kids on the next school day.
(Some) Non-Homeschool will also feel a lump of indignation, (because believe me, I'm not just poking fun at myself) (Oh no, you didn't get off that easy)

And this will be my last warning.  Beware.

What they think: (they, being non-homeschooled)
I spend the day in my pajamas. 



What they don't know:
  Really?  Yeah, actually you may be right.  Some days this is my sad lot.  But it's not because I don't want to get dressed.  You see, between dishes, laundry, breakfast, beds, grumpies, and the start of the school day, there just aren't enough hours between 7 and 9.  And for you who awaken, proverb 31 like, at 4 in the morning, holy smokes, how do you not drink 2 gallons of coffee before 10 in the morning.  Just because I homeschool doesn't mean I don't need my beauty sleep.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What they think:
We all dress like we got stuck in the 80's or 90's, jumpers and coolats (I really don't want to google that spelling, don't make me) are a fashion trend.  And the bigger the pleats, the closer to God

What they don't know:
We're determined, this lot of us, to raise a generation of Cool kids, ya'll.  Except for the days i'm in my pajamas, I'll probably be trying fashion trends (in the privacy of my own house) you've never even heard of.  And maybe even wearing a heel or two.  Don't stop at my house.  The garish makeup on my face may make you think you've got the wrong address.  There are sincerely some of us who actually would like to come off as culturally decent.  You'll find my daughter in her sequined hat or a slouchy beany pecking away at her school work in her skinny jeans and completely clashing shirt ensemble.  The boys will be wearing some awesome ripped denim and the latest $2.99 shirts from Old Navy, Children's Place, or the Gap.  And maybe even sporting a faux hauk.  (Or hawk.)

 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What they think:
Our older kids are raising our younger kids.  And we've got some kind of militant buddy system in place.


What they don't know:
Someone else raising  my kids?  You're seriously joking, right?  I mean that's the reason I homeschool in the first place.  Nah.  Sure, the big kids tote the little ones around on a good day.  But there are some days when, for the love of pete, could I just please be the Mother in this house already?  You boss your sib one more time, and it's to your room little miss.  The pleasure of parenting without the parented looking over your shoulder every second of every day, just waiting to pounce on your imperfections, will seem like heaven to you.  It'll take all the grace of God and a well seasoned therapist to work through all that baggage someday.  Can't wait.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


What they think:
My family only eats whole grains, lean protein, fruits, and we never cease to munch on a black carrot, kohlrabi, kale leaf or artichoke heart.


What they don't know:
I will readily admit to wanting my family to eat as healthy as possible.  It's good for them, and it's good for me.  I mean, have you ever had to deal with a kid coming off a sugar high, and you've got no place to hide till the little tornado ceases to spin?  There are occasional, ok-rather often, days when I'd like to slap a twinkie, a licorice stick, some iced tea, and bologna on white bread into a lunch box and let a teacher deal with it.  But instead, I'll just cook up some mac and cheese, toss some chocolate milk and a straw at them and call it lunch.  Because I just made gluten free french toast, turkey sausage, and a green smoothie for them for breakfast, for crying out loud.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What they think:
If they talk about their cool schools and awesome teachers and well socialized kids for long enough, they might convince me to join the ranks of normal civilization.


What they don't know:
Some of us homeschool out of conviction.  And ain't nobody, nohow, gonna change my mind. I am my own man, I abide by my laws, and I will never back down from all that is good and right.  Or some of us, do it cause we don't have options.  Whether it's finances, a bad school district, whatever...some of us would gladly cry "uncle" and be done.  But we plug away, and maybe we'll secretly admit (on a good day) that, yeah, this isn't so bad.  And boy howdy how we'd miss the little men and women if they'd be gone All the day long.  On second thought, what DO mothers who's kids are gone, do all day long?  Reruns of "All My Children"?  (Never mind, soap operas are for old ladies)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What they think:
We all play an instrument and our lives interacting with each other are like one harmonious four part quartet.  Oh, and we all dress in matching outfits.

What they don't know:
If we could just make it out of our pajamas in the morning without a time out or an intervention of some kind, it'd be a miracle.  We always have a word or character trait of the month, you know, and since patience is our word, we will sit quietly without raising our voices.  Make polite conversation while mother flips pancakes, and ask if there would happen to be something helpful they could do for another sibling.  Oh, how I long to raise the perfect quartet of children.  Polished, brilliant, with every Godly character trait in the whole book of Proverbs oozing from their beings.  If only Adam hadn't eaten that apple and spoiled it for the rest of us.  Ah, the little buggers have a sin nature.  And the people we're most comfortable with is where it all comes out.  So believe me, we're dealing with a whole lot of sin from the moment we show our bed heads till the last argument over what song we sing at bedtime.  And why would we all dress the same?  Oh, yeah, we might get lost on the playground.  Or on the college campus when we partake of the extracurricular classes they offer while we're only in the third grade.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What they think:
That dad is called "Father" and mom is "Mother" and we have very strict house rules about PDA's and Modest is Hottest.

What they don't know:
Yeah, I went there.  Let the gagging commence. (sister, you reading this?) Prudence, when it comes to my man, is not my strong suit. You probably already know that from this post.  I happen to think my kids are lucky to be able to watch us kiss, hug, and chase each other around the house.  I'll never apologize for that.  I'll also not apologize for the Victoria's Secret bag that made it's way into my house the other week.  Because I might homeschool and raise sheltered kids, but I will be hot when it comes to my man.  I'll also not apologize for teaching my kids about healthy sexuality and writing it off as a subject learned on their quarterly school reports.  All things in moderation, I do think this can be taken too far, too much education at too young an age.  But I don't think a complete head in the sand, ignorance is bliss approach got any homeschooler an A+ for purity when they're 20.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
What they think:
We listen to quiet, orchestra music.  Music that edifies the soul and the mind.  Soothing, classical.  Or maybe even some acapella.

What they don't know:
Maybe I should be more ashamed of this than I am.  But, yo, we crank it loud.  A little bit of rap, lots of worship, and Britt Nicole, Toby Mac, and this song are on repeat some days.  And we pretend to drop it like it's hot.  Our dance moves stink, but we always come out the other side a bit happier.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What they think:
My kids vocabulary is beyond their age.  They look like nerds, talk like nerds, and only respond to adults.

What they don't know:
Respond to adults?  They heel and sit and shake on command.  You'd be so impressed.  Talk like small brains on a set of legs?  Yep.  Statistics show that, in college, my kids will whup your kids' tails.  Er, grades.  So, take that and smoke it in your pipe.

 -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What they think:
I just spend days on end writing blog posts.  And in my pajamas, of course. (Redundant, we've already been over that)

What they don't know:
Yep, you got me.  I just wasted most of a day writing this, cup of coffee and a smashing oatmeal/peanut butter/choc chunk cookie in hand.  My kids ran naked through the house whooping like war indians, the laundry runneth over the baskets, the dishes smell like yesterdays chili, and the mailman delivered a whopper doctor bill. (What that had to do with this, I have no idea.  Just a plug for the greatest health care in the world.  When they sink you with a $350 bill for 30 seconds of the docs time, someone is going down.)  My apologies for making my day look so much grander than yours ever could. 
    
 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
We're not keeping score here, ok?  I'm not in one corner of the ring throwing punches your way, and I pray you're not getting ready to throw one my direction either.  But isn't it funny how we have these unspoken limitations on each other and our "school" choices?  How about let's just not size each other up out of the corner of our eyes and just love the differences we've got.  And how our kids are different.  And let's meet for a play date next week.  Say, 10am, on a Wednesday.  Oh, that's right.  Your children are going to be in school. Oh, that creates a vacuum.  Well, Guess I'll be having a playdate with my own kids.  Or baking a dozen loaves of whole wheat bread, butchering 10 chickens, making my own soap, and knitting a new scarf, all while answering the latest question about the culture of Lappland, or explaining a diphthong (google that, why don't you).  No offense, ok?
*Laughter is good medicine.

JO